Reflections.............................on the Road to Recovery
Part 2 of 2- Self-caring
I recently read about a tool that I have started using and really like. Even when we are on a new path, a good path of recovery and wholeness, we are going to make mistakes - do things we don't like - and although we know they were wrong and we make an amend, to either another, ourselves, or God - we at times continue to beat ourselves up - feeding the "I'm not a very good person syndrome". We learned from our mistake, asked for forgiveness, and want to go a new direction - but still the self-condemnation continues.
So the tool I was given goes something like this- Write a letter to yourself about the mistake. However, write it from the perspective of what you would tell someone… who made a similar mistake... someone. you really cared about.
If you were talking to this person who was trying to get better, to be a good person, do the right things... wouldn't you offer a word of encouragement? Wouldn't you suggest they let this thing go and move forward? Wouldn't you point out all the progress they had made in so many other areas? Wouldn't you remind them we are not perfect, just frail human beings on a spiritual path?
Write the letter from the perspective of a caring and loving friend.
Welcome Back. What a unique idea! I like it. I think this could be very effective for me because I do have a tendency be less tolerant of my own mistakes as opposed to a friend, family member or sponsee. And I won't have to wait long to try this because I will always be a "work in progress" !!!!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Steve. I'm still "testing" this tool. I watch closely the balance between beating myself up and giving myself too much leeway-i.e. lack of discipline. With God's help and direction I'm hopeful I will better find the right balance- a day at a time-
ReplyDeleteGood point Rick. Thanks for the tip. I will also pay attention and with practice find the right balance to use these letters effectively.
Delete